Tuesday, October 11, 2011

So much has happened

It's been a long time since I've written-almost a year!  I'm doing a lot better than I was then, but some things have still not changed.  I've been on the same meds for a few months now, but the mood stabilizer isn't helping much.  Part of me doesn't want to change it the next time I see the doctor, but another part of me wants to because I still feel depressed and am very easily agitated.  I have become ten times more sensitive than before I was diagnosed a few years ago.  I have to be very careful about what I read, what I hear, and what I see.  The littlest thing can set me off and destroy my day, and then ultimately cause me not to sleep at night.  The Xanax helps a bit, but I still deal with the anxiety a great deal.

I am in the process of looking for a job which is a great step forward.  But honestly, I am praying nothing is like the last experience I had with employment.  It just made me super sick and I ended up in the hospital.  I pray I don't have to go to the hospital ever again.  To make matters even more difficult I have had migraines since the beginning of the summer.  My therapist says it's because I can't handle my emotions, but I try my best and even then it doesn't seem to help much.  I think it will get better though.  I'm trying to make new friends, volunteering, and am going to AA.  I think I might be on the right track.

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